restoration

so many things to write about...so little time. i sometimes wonder how uncovered i should be...but it's not really in my nature to be fake. and yet, there is a delicate balance between speaking my mind and speaking my heart. i think most people would be glad to know that the greatest percentage of the time i speak my heart. the words inside my head are not always kind and not often true. in the same way, some of the things i have believed for a long time - with my heart - may not be kind and they may not be true. it all makes me so thankful that God is here. to help. to sort out. to keep me from speaking. to move me to speak. i could do life without Him...i mean, people do it all the time...but why would i? how could i? my identity is completely wrapped up in Him and the things i believe about myself are the things i know He believes about me. i'd like to tell you the whole story, but it's long so i'll just tell you the ending...or rather the movement towards the ending, because i'm still in process :). God gave me my heart back. every piece that has fallen out along my 31 years of life. every broken relationship. every stinging word. He picks up each piece, no matter the size, and fuses it back to my heart. and each time, there isn't even a trace of where the hole once was. i have always felt love. i have always had joy. but it is so much bigger and greater. and now...i feel like i'm really stepping into my destiny.