flat on the floor

so...i've been meaning to update my blog...but i got busy...then i got sick...then i got better...then i had a massive back spasm that sent me to the ER and i ended up sleeping for like 4 days...at least, it felt like 4 days straight of sleep because of the way those drugs knocked me out. sheesh. the story isn't really worth telling except for the part where the Lord began healing my back and He blessed me with friends who called or texted to check up on me...and one dear friend who brought me lunch and dinner the first day - the day i could barely get out of bed. in the midst of all the excitement/craziness i remember thinking how frustrated and mad i was that everything was messed up. not just my own plans, but also the way my injury was completely inconveniencing people at work. even still, at the end of every day, i was reminded of God's goodness. despite whatever pain i felt, i would eventually be fine. my pain...my injury...it would all go away. i'm now sitting in the office at work and i've worked a total of 28 hours in the last 3 days and most of it has been pain free. i was recently told by someone that they had a completely different impression of how i felt about my previous job than how i actually felt about it and i realized that there must be something inside of my brain that somehow glosses over all the good stuff when i'm venting to certain people about the not-so-great stuff. i'm working on changing that...so that whenever i'm relaying information to people about my life, i'm giving a more balanced picture...maybe even tipping the scales to the more positive as much as i can...so what's the point? why did i take you on this little rabbit trail? because even when life was pretty sucky being stuck in bed and sleeping so much, there were always things to be thankful for. even when i was flat on the floor, i was thankful i could move my legs enough to push myself into the other room to get my phone to call for help. when i was laying in bed, i was thankful the sun was shining and i could look out at blue sky and green trees. when i was bummed about not being able to swim across the lake, i was thankful to be at the lake celebrating my friend swimming across. when i felt bad that i couldn't work, i was thankful there were others who could work in my place...and even more thankful that each day in bed brought be closer to working again. God is soooooo good and i'm finding the more i reflect on His goodness, the more i see the good things He's doing. i am really really spoiled and i'm pretty sure it's because i'm His favorite :)...and i bet, if you start looking for His goodness, you'll find you're His favorite too ;)

happy birthday to meeeeeeee!

today i am 31 :) most people think i'm 18. hahaha. that's fun. it has been a peaceful, restful, wonderful day filled with sweet surprises, lots of hugs (my favorite), and tons of laughter with people who are so dear to me...and some sweet time of worship with my Jesus. these are the things i treasure. i am so loved. days like today are the ones i put in my quiver so that when the enemy comes - because he will - i can pull this day out and shoot it straight to the heart of every lie he speaks about my worth. even if i had no friends, i am still so loved by God...but i have friends. wonderful. amazing. loving friends. who are so kind and generous. the love they pour on me is an overflow of the Father's love for them and a tangible reminder of His love for me. and it is so good. in this, the 31st year of my life, i have one desire: to be wholly His. i want to worship Him with every breath and become who i was meant to be...holding nothing back...and being held back by nothing. i don't want my life to be the same...and i have a feeling it won't be. ever again. yay :)

take it all in

i'm here. finally. new room. new address. my friends are just as amazing as they have always been. surrounding me with love. inviting me over for dinner and i really can't believe i'm here. it only took me two minutes to get to the worship service this morning. unbelievable. i realized this morning that i have never in my life lived so close to church. but really that isn't the biggest blessing. it's being in community. i am so spoiled to live near so many dear friends. i hope i never take it for granted. everything leading me to this place has been the Lord. it feels like i've come home again...and i am so thankful.