learning to love again

moving. it's this crazy thing that often brings out so many emotions you'd never expect. i've been away from "home" for nearly two months. there have been many things that have made this transition easier than i expected...being a familiar place, re-connecting with familiar faces, loving my kids from the moment i met them...but it's been hard at the same time. i don't know if that part will ever really go away. leaving is ALWAYS hard for me. maybe it's because i love SO deeply...and it doesn't take very long for me to get there either. i had a conversation with a parent of a student the other day and he was concerned because his daughter was having a really hard time, emotionally. in the short span of a month, she's started kindergarten, the family has moved to a new house, and they had to give their dog away because their yard isn't big enough for a dog. her dad was concerned because his sweet little girl seems to be taking things really hard. i reassured him that she'll bounce back by telling him about all the times i've moved in my life and that, eventually, i was okay...in fact eventually i fell in love with wherever i was. this whole conversation got me thinking about the process i go through whenever i move. honestly, it takes me about a year before i'm willing to put down solid roots...because i'm afraid i'll just move away again...it's this funny thing because i love people so quickly and yet when i first move somewhere i put up this wall because i get scared i'll have to say goodbye to really amazing people before i've really had a chance to know them. then i think about my job. teaching is like that, you can pretty much guarantee you'll only teach each group for a year (well, 9 months really). that's all you have. i don't hold back with them. i can love those kids from the second i lay eyes on them and that love lasts FOREVER. so i've made a decision...scary as it may be. all i have is right now...this moment...the people who are in my life - whether you're HERE or THERE -...and i'm going to treasure it...because that's what love is really about. treasuring the time we have RIGHT NOW...because we've never been promised more than that.